For A Few Movies More

“A crime is a crime. Either you commit a crime, or you don’t. If you do commit a crime, then you are a criminal. Surely that is logical.” – Thomas Keneally, from his stage play, “Our Country’s Good”.

Every time you put a DVD in the player, it’s the same. You can’t watch your movie without first sitting through fifty seconds of irritating footage guilt tripping you about why movie piracy is so wrong, whether you’re actually guilty of it, or not, right? Yes, it’s the “Piracy Streetpeople” campaign, that annoyingly loud, and cumbersome campaign that has been running for years now to little or no avail. It has done little, if anything, to stop movie piracy, in Australia, or anywhere else for that matter.

In the last couple of weeks it became official: Iron Man is one of the biggest and most popular superheroes of our time. Not so long ago the comic book heroes were resigned to live amongst the greasy thumbs and forefingers of the fanboys at Comic Kingdom, and flicker by the hypnotic stares of children every Superhero Saturday. For so long there was only room for Batman and Superman to rule the big screen, but new technologies paved the way for a web slinging teenager in a spider suit to make a lazy billion dollars every few years and it became only logical to give every hero and his superdog a chance at the big time. For every success – Bats, Spidey and the X-Men – there were more than a few misses; even Superman had a short lived revival. But in 2008 we had a new entry into the genre that would challenge the upper-echelons. Iron Man, well known in the comics but relying on the much more recognisable Robert Downey Jr to get the attention of the wider populace, starred in what was one of the best origins films ever made. And five years, three films and too many squillions of dollars later Tony Stark has become one of the most captivating, popular and simply entertaining characters out there. So what is it about this cocky, arrogant, entitled billionaire that makes him so great?

The films and books that you connect with when you’re a spritely little pre-teener, full of hope and driven solely by fun, are some of the purest experiences you will have with art and entertainment. You’re old enough to appreciate a good story, but not old enough for the trash of teenage lust, or the pre-tense of a budding hipster, or the decaying hope as you enter your late twenties, thirties and beyond. For myself, and countless other eighties babies, the children’s horror series Goosebumps was the perfect marriage. Combining fun and engaging writing with the supernatural, author R L Stine took us on a monthly escape with mummies, ghouls, ghosts, werewolves, witches, shrunken heads and a couple more mummies, with twists and turns, and an almost brutal ability finish each chapter teetering on a knife edge.

I couldn’t get enough (well, that is until I discovered Animorphs) so you can imagine the rush of nostalgia as I read the news that they are planning to bring Goosebumps to the big screen! My head was swirling with fond memories – admittedly most were of the joy of reading the series rather than the actual stories themselves, but I banded together with fellow FFMM writers Dean and Jason to put together a couple of our favourites which we would love to see re-imagined. We’re not sure how the film will be constructed as yet, but whether it is an amalgamation of a couple stories, one stand alone feature or even an anthology-style film, all I know is it will be awesome- or at least mildly entertaining like that TV series they did…

Read on for our picks

The Academy Awards are always a fun time in the Hollywood calendar. Regardless of the common criticisms and dubious choices the premier awards event is still a great conversation starter and another chance to celebrate celebrities and the movies they create. So in light of the upcoming ceremony I’d like to weigh in with my two cents about which film I would like to win the Best Picture category – Life Of Pi. I could choose Life of Pi for any number of reasons: for the beautiful imagery, for the religious connotations or simply for the fact that of the 9 contenders for Best Picture this is the only one I have seen. Whatever the case may be let me take a few moments to share my thoughts on why it deserves the nod.

Life Of Pi is based on the 2001 book of the same name. It is best summarised by breaking down through the many layers of intrigue and human spirit to what is essentially an exercise in faith. Pi is a middle aged Indian man living in Canada who receives a visit from a writer looking for a story that has been promised to make you believe in God. Pi proceeds to tell his story over a cup of tea, beginning in his youth and describing how he was introduced to some of the major religions in different points in his life. He was as open minded as any man of God could be, adopting Hindu, Christianity and Islam into his daily practices and doing so against his atheist father’s wishes. But his faith is put to the ultimate test when his father decides to move their family zoo to Canada via a commercial Japanese boat. A massive storm hits the ship, causing it to sink, and the only survivors to escape on a small lifeboat are Pi, an Orang-utan, a Hyena, an injured Zebra, and Richard Parker – an adult Bengal Tiger.

So 2012 has come to pass, and the world didn’t end… Hooray! Film-wise, we’ve seen some jaw-droppers and we’ve seen some stinkers, but the past year was a very special year for me personally because during my awesome travelling I got to attend the 62nd Berlinale, also known as the Berlin Film Festival. I’ve long been a fan of film festivals because it’s a time where for about two weeks I can completely geek out, gorge myself on movies, spend too much money and be totally OK with it, and generally be the happiest kid on earth. Getting to attend one of the Big Three was an experience that I’ll never forget, and made me love movies even more, if that was even possible!

So I hope that all you film geeks out there had an exciting year as well, and may we get more awesome movies in 2013. Just quickly, I have Warm Bodies, The Host, Star Trek Into Darkness, Mortal Instruments, plus the sequels to Kick-Ass, Hunger Games, and The Hobbit to look forward to. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a pretty damn entertaining year to me! And maybe some of you will even get to Venice or Sundance or Cannes, or hey, Berlin! It’s the best thing you could wish for a fellow film fan. And as always, we love comments, so please tell me what movie I missed out on, or which one you agree with or think I stuffed up. Happy New Year folks! Thank you for your continued patronage =)

This one\’s a given, right? Possibly one of the most iconic Christmas movies ever, you might think an esteemed website such as ours would be above choosing the obvious, but no. We\’re all about conforming to the masses. Seriously though, It\’s A Wonderful Life may be a bit of a cliché as far as choosing Christmas movies goes, but there\’s a reason why it is so iconic and popular — because it really is a wonderful film. But in what way?

The film starts out focused on some heavenly bodies discussing the circumstances of a man named George (James Stewart). Apparently he\’s about to kill himself, and they decide to send down a second-class (as yet wingless) angel to help him get back on the right path. We follow George\’s life from when he was a child, saving his brother, losing his hearing, working at the local drugstore, to growing up working at his father\’s company, and marrying the-girl-that-was-there-all-along Mary (Donna Reed), plus all inbetween. And we watch as this wonderful young man time and time again gets thwarted from his lifelong dream of travelling the world, and his spirit and character gets chipped away. His life and bad luck finally collide one Christmas eve when he comes upon the realisation that he is financially worth more dead than alive, and that killing himself may solve everyone\’s problems. Enter Clarence (Henry Travers) the would-be angel who, A Christmas Carol-style, shows George a different point of view on what life would be like without him, and tries to get George to realise his own self-worth.

The spirit of Christmas is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot come end of year celebrations. What does it really mean? Does it mean be loving to your family? Be cruel to your credit card? Or is simply a reminder to go to church for the second time that year? Personally I love Christmas and always have. I loved the idea of Santa even when I stopped believing. I loved the presents – initially receiving them, but more recently I love giving them. And my favourite sight at this time of the year is a big Christmas tree in the living room with a big collection of presents.

But let’s face it: Christmas has become a money spinning holiday, twisted to the will of a bottomless pit of consumer culture. From Santa to Jesus there is commercial interest attached and that most definitely encompasses the seasonal cinematic sub-genre. When it comes to understanding the spirit of Christmas there is no greater propaganda machine than Hollywood. And when it comes to striking that fine balance between Western greed and genuine holiday cheer there is no better movie at defining “Christmas spirit” than Miracle on 34^th Street.

Wait a moment! You’re thinking. That’s not a Christmas movie! Is it? Quite correct. It is not. But then, technically neither is “Home Alone”. It is merely a movie that happens to take place at Christmas, and the same can be said of many other films. While Monty Python’s notoriously controversial tale of the misadventures of Brian of Nazareth, a simple Jew who almost surpasses John Lennon at being bigger than Jesus Christ, might be considered more of an Easter flick with its climax involving crucifixion on a hill, I feel it still counts as a Christmas film, partly due to its opening scene being a parody of the Nativity, but also due to its take on the role that organised religion plays in so many people’s lives. While many of us see Christmas as simply a nice day in December when we get to take a day off work, see the family, exchange some gifts and stuff our faces until we couldn’t move if the house caught fire, Christmas is first and foremost a religious holiday. This was Python’s target: religion and the way it controls our lives. But let us steer clear of the controversial stuff. The Pythons were good at that, I am not.

At the height of Macaulay Culkin’s fame came a sound lesson about the importance of family, as an en masse family Christmas holiday to Paris takes a turn for the worst when the parents realise they have been a tad careless in their headcount, and have inadvertently left their eight year old son at home all by himself. Children of my generation will have fond memories of splitting our sides with laughter as cute little Culkin puts the Wet Bandits (Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern) through hell in their quest to burgle from his home, an apparently quite lucrative target. This was, of course, the important part, with the lesson in the importance of family being a conveniently wholesome housing for a riotous rollercoaster ride of sight gags and amusing injuries. But never mind that… the film was a huge hit, and went down in history as an instant classic, and the defining point of Culkin’s career, then considered to be America’s greatest child star since Shirley Temple, before he went on to do forgettable flops like “Richie Rich” and “Getting Even With Dad”, as his career declined.

It’s nearly Christmas once again, and you can just tell by the festive sounds in the air. The echo of carollers, the laughter of children, the Ho Ho Ho’s of department store Santas, the crackling shrieks of little green monsters as they wreak havoc upon the neighbourhood. Wait, what was that last one again? Monster movies are usually not associated with Christmas for a good reason, there’s nothing particularly jolly about watching grotesque creatures attacking people. But this is where Gremlins differs from the norm. The film is as much an ode to the holiday season as much it is a fun monster flick. Early on the film uses Christmas as a cheery backdrop to lull audiences into a false sense of security, and it works! It’s hard not to feel that joyful nostalgic feeling in your stomach as you look upon all the attractive decorations while Christmas tunes soothe your ears. But just as you begin to feel comfortable, Gremlins takes a sudden 180-degree turn and finally begins to lead up to its mischievous name.

The plot of Gremlins sees teenager Billy (Zach Galligan) receive an exceptional early Christmas gift from his father, a Mogwai named Gizmo. An adorable little fuzzy creature like no other, the Mogwai is a complacent and friendly pet, although with it comes three simple rules. Rule number one; don’t expose the Mogwai to bright lights. Rule number two; never get the Mogwai wet. And rule number three, never, ever feed the Mogwai after midnight. Of course Billy proceeds to break all three of these rules, thereby releasing an army of angry, green monsters upon his small town of Kingston Falls on Christmas Eve.