For A Few Movies More

I love the Friday The 13th franchise. Wait let me reword that, I adore the Friday The 13th series. Adore may sound like a strange word to associate with a line of films revolving around a psychotic murder who slaughters camp counsellors while wearing a hockey mask, however since these are the very films that moulded my love for the horror genre, adore doesn’t seem like such a strong word. Sure the movies may often be goofy, poorly made and sometimes just plain dumb, but all of these supposed detractions only further add to the fun charm they exude.

I vividly remember watching the original Friday The 13th for the first time as a youngster. I was vacationing in The States close to Halloween at the time, and while late one night my family chose to sleep, I happened to notice that the first Friday The 13th film was playing on TV. Since this was a supposedly terrifying film whose reputation preceded it, I felt I should attempt to brave the horrific sights it might hold. As it turned out, all of the gore had been censored on TV, but despite viewing this watered down variation of the film, a single solitary image still managed to be burnt into my brain for all time. As the movie wound to an end and our heroine Alice relaxed in the safe confines of her canoe, I too breathed a sigh of relief and mentally readied myself for bed. But just as the moment one would expect the credits would start rolling arrived, HOLY SHIT JASON JUMPS OUT OF THE WATER AND PULLS ALICE UNDER!!!

This was the exact moment I was hooked on the horror genre and I’ve been a slightly over obsessive fan ever since. None of the other Friday The 13th movies pack a scare even close to the one mentioned above, but what they lack in thrills they most definitely make for in gory carnage. The death scenes are the main reason you dabble in the series, and seeing as how a great deal of these messy murders are horrifically inventive, you won’t soon forget many of them. So with today being Friday the 13th, what better time than to look back at some of the best death scenes of the entire series. And just to be clear, when I say best, I mean the meanest, goriest, most horrifically brutal death scenes of the series. As well as a few funny ones. Also obviously there be spoilers ahead, so enter at your own risk! With that said, I hope you enjoy your Friday the 13th and hopefully if your day goes as planned, you won’t end up like any of the poor sods featured on the list below.

13. Spear To The Eye – Friday The 13th Part 3

There’s nothing fancy about this kill, it’s just a spear delivered straight to the eye courtesy of an underwarter speargun. It’s actually one of the more disturbing death scenes in the series if you ask me, if only for the fact that it looks brutal and the idea behind it isn’t really that far-fetched. That is as long as you can see past the obvious fishing wire guiding the spear to its target. What really makes this scene so special however is that right before the killing blow is dealt, we get to see Jason wearing his trademark hockey mask for this first time. What a way to make an entrance.

12. Smiley Face Death – Friday The 13th Part 6

This poor, unfortunate paintball player in Friday The 13th Part 6 was unlucky enough to stumble across Jason in the middle of his latest killing spree. Following an altercation, Mr paintball is delivered a swift death when Jason slams his head into a tree with superhuman force. That sounds typical of Jason’s MO, but what makes this particular assault amusing is that Jason’s victim leaves a clear imprint of his face into the bark of the tree; a crude smiley face. Hilarious.

11. Hacksaw Twist – Friday The 13th Part 4

This is what happens when you’re a perverted mortician. Axel here is too focused on the lovely lady he’s going to score with that he fails to notice the crazed, unkillable psychopath that was just wheeled into his morgue still has some killing left to do. His punishment; his head is cut halfway off with a hacksaw before being twisted a full one-eighty degrees around. Gruesome stuff.

10.Handstand Disembowelment – Friday The 13th Part 3

The below picture is a clear warning as to why you should never try to impress girls by walking around on your hands. If you do, a crazed murderer will hack you right where you never want to be hacked before dumping your now mangled body in the roof rafters where it will most likely be discovered at the most opportune time. The lesson here? Don’t be a showboat…

9. Mrs Vorhees Dies – Friday The 13th

If Scream taught horror newcomers anything, it was that Jason Vorhess wasn’t the killer in the first Friday The 13th movie. Instead the slaughtering duties were left to Jason’s dear old mother, Pamela Voorhees. Following her impressive killing spree, poor old Mrs Vorhess suffers perhaps the most graphic death scene of the entire film when lone survivor Alice, fighting for her dear life, desperately swings a boat oar at Pameala’s head, efficiently removing it from her shoulders. However instead of dropping dead on the spot, Pamela first squeezes her fists in bitter defeat while blood pumps from her neck stump, before finally collapsing for good.

8. Heart Ripped Out – Friday The 13th Part 6

Featuring perhaps the greatest opening sequence in the entire Friday The 13th franchise, Part 6 begins with a matured Tommy Jarvis digging up the body of Jason Voorhees to make sure his nemesis is indeed resting six feet underground. Bad idea. Not long after discovering Jason’s lifeless corpse, Tommy drives a large metal spike through the dead fiend, which in turn acts as an electrical conductor that instantly draws a lightning bolt out of the sky, promptly resurrecting Jason from his slumber. Uh oh. Tommy manages to escape, but the same can’t be said for his unlucky friend who has his beating heart literally punched out of his body. As if this sequence wasn’t memorable enough, Jason then proceeds to get his own James Bond inspired opening credits moment when he turns to the camera, swings his machete with gusto and basks in a familiar dripping blood effect.

7. Arrow Through The Throat – Friday The 13th

Long before brave adventurers were taking arrows to the knee in the land of Skyrim, Kevin Bacon was setting the standard by taking an arrow to the throat. This nasty and unexpected effect came curtsey of a young Tom Savini, and it shows. There weren’t many other, if any other, horror films at the time capable of showing such a clear and seamless display of bloodletting. For once, we as an audience actually got to see the arrow pierce the victim’s throat in clear view, an effect that still impresses today. Plus the fact that such a gruesome act was inflicted upon a young Kevin Bacon only makes it all the more memorable.

6. Jason ”Dies” – Friday The 13th Part 4

Friday The 13th Part 4 was dubbed The Final Chapter, so the filmmakers kind of had to kill Jason off. And as a young Cory Feldman drove a machete through Jason’s head before stepping back and watching the crazed killer slide down the blade, it looked as though the madman might have finally met his match. But off course this was just a tease. Despite his lethal wounds, Jason was back on his feet before too long, chasing unsuspecting camp counsellors around like nothing ever happened. What makes this particular death scene so memorable is the sheer level of detail that went into destroying Jason’s face. I mean it looks like a bandsaw cutting through a pigs carcass.

5. Wheelchair Ride Of Doom – Friday The 13th Part 2

This death scene rates so highly merely because of the sheer brutal nature of it. You would think that out of anyone, the friendly, mild-mannered wheelchair bound guy just might make it to the end of a slasher film without dying a horrible death. But nope, despite the high body count in Friday The 13th part two, walking-impaired Mark probably cops it the worst. After going for a roll around Camp Crystal Lake’s grounds, Mark suddenly receives a brutally delivered machete to the face curtsey of one pissed off Jason Voorhees. That should have been enough, but following on from this killing blow Mark is sent hurtling down a steep flight of stairs situated behind him, his body flapping around lifelessly as he slams down each step. It’s an unbelievably cruel scene, but that doesn’t stop it from being one of the funniest death scenes in the entire franchise. Seriously, I dare you to watch it without at least smirking.

4. Eye pop – Friday The 13th Part 3

There’s nothing subtle here, Jason creeps up on his victim, grips their head and then crushes it with all his might until he receives a dangling eye for his troubles. All in glorious 3D! What makes this spectacularly violent moment stand out in particular are the terrible special effects on display. You can see the wire that the eye is attached to, plus it couldn’t be more obvious that we’re looking at a prosthetic head, but you ask me, that’s the charm of it.

3. Sleeping Bag Smackdown – Jason X

Jason X, depending on your opinion, is either where the series jumped the shark, or veered into a refreshing, tounge in cheek territory. But no matter whether you loved or hated the film, there’s one sequence in particular that no fan of the series can resist. After being thawed out of his cryogenic freezing chamber, Jason is now running rampant throughout a futuristic spacecraft. In order to buy themselves a little time, the crew of the ship project Jason into a virtual reality world where he can participate in his favorite activity, killing teens! The two fictional, nubile teenage girls Jason is confronted quickly strip off in front of the puzzled maniac before retreating into their sleeping bags. Unable to help himself, Jason picks up one of the sleeping bags still containing one of his intended victims, and uses it beat the other unsuspecting teenager to death. Once satisfied with his job, Jason finishes off his original victim by swinging the sleeping bag of doom into a tree tunk with tremendous force, extracting a faint yelp from inside. This scene is off course a spin on a similar death sequence seen in part 7, however the one seen here is much funnier in its execution.

2. Cryogenic Face Smash – Jason X

It’s funny, I’m not a huge fan of Jason X on a whole, but it’s host to two of the most memorable death scenes in the entire Friday The 13th catalogue. This sequence in particular is without a doubt one of the most creative in the series. Utilising the futuristic technology, a recently thawed out Jason makes short work of a of an unfortunate intern when he dumps her face repeatedly into a bath of cryogenic cooling material, causing his victim’s face to slowly freeze and crack with each repeated dunk, before finally smashing the now completely frozen face onto a steel counter, breaking it into red, crystalized pieces.

1. Ultimate Knockout Punch – Friday The 13th Part 8

Ok, so here’s the thing. If you’re ever cornered by an unstoppable madman who has killed nearly everybody you’ve ever known, do not, I repeat, do NOT attempt to engage him in a fist fight. If you do, you’ll first bloody your fists by laying into his obviously sturdy hockey mask, before taking a single punch that will send your head flying off a multi-story building and into a dumpster below.